Goldy Gopher

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Goldy

Position: Mascot
Height: 5'13"
City/State: Minneapolis, Minn.
Alma Mater: Everlasting Student

CAREER NOTES: The most diverse and complete multi-sport athlete at the University of Minnesota • Appears at over 600 outings and events a year • Entertains young and old alike with shenanigan filled ways and humorous nature • Often uses the trademark "Spin your head" to fire up crowds at various sporting events • National Champion at the 2011 and 2013 Universal Cheerleaders Association National Championships in Orlando, Fla. •  Placed 3rd in 2009 •  2nd in the 2007 Capital One Bowl Mascot Challenge • And 1st in the hearts of Gopher fans everywhere • Pulled over 1,235,448(±6) pranks last year •  Enjoys riding his maroon and gold T3 around the U of M campus and interacting with University students • This ain't Goldy's first rodeo • Goldy has won 19 cars thanks to golfing hole-in-one's, but has donated them all to the Showcase Showdown on the Price is Right • This is Goldy's second rodeo  • Can speak braille  • Goldy owns the oldest living tamagotchi • This is Goldy’s 3rd rodeo • When seeking advice dear Abby writes to Goldy • When a tree falls in the forest and no one is around Goldy hears it • Goldy wears pants in public (unlike Bucky) • Goldy can count to Big 10 (±4) • Goldy obtained unobtainium • Goldy made it to the last book of Game of Thrones • Goldy ate too much and got kicked out of the Hunger Games • Goldy said maybe to the dress • Goldy messed with Texas • Chuck Norris makes Goldy Gopher jokes • Morgan Freeman’s life is narrated by Goldy

HIGH SCHOOL: Goldy is a genius and did not attend high school, started directly at the collegiate level.

RECRUITING: Chosen by every coaching staff, fan, student, and Minnesotan to represent the University. • Ranked #1 in his class and position by scout.com. • Is/was all-conference, all-section, all-area, all-state, all-midwest, all-american, all-planets (including Pluto).

PERSONAL: Born too long ago to remember • Family member to every University of Minnesota student, staff, and faculty past or present • Plans to attend the University until mascotting becomes a legitimate and respected major and field of study • Goldy is an only child • Goldy voted for Pedro

PERSONAL FRIENDS, ACQUAINTANCES, AND INFLUENCES: Minnesota Timberwolves "Crunch" • Minnesota Wild's "Nordy" • Minnesota Vikings "Viktor" • Minnesota Twins "TC Bear" • The gopher from Caddyshack • The Hoff (Blake Hoffarber and David Hasselhoff) • Resident Dog Walker for Richard Pitino, Jerry Kill, and Don Lucia • Joe, from Average Joe's Gymnasium • Patches O'Houlihan• Annie from Annie’s Parlor • Joe Mauer • "Chunk" from the Goonies and his Truffle Shuffle • Johnny Cash •  Snoopy (he doesn't talk) • Ron Burgundy (he does talk) • Billy Mays (R.I.P) • The creator of the Shamwow (It works wonders on Goldy's Fur) • Eric Decker • All of the Brady Bunch but Marsha

RIVALS AND ENEMIES: Bucky • Sparty the Spartan • Bucky • Chip the Buffalo • Bucky • Also Bucky the Badger • Did we mention Bucky?

WEBSITES:
http://www.facebook.com/goldythegopher00
http://www.youtube.com/goldythegopher
http://www.twitter.com/goldythegopher

Goldy